Thanks to my mind's ability to repress unwanted information, I completely forgot about this. Unfortunately, a recent tweet caught my eye and the horrible memory came flooding back. March 14th, my Birthday, the day of all that is good and holy, is officially dubbed Steak & BJ Day. Seriously? Steak AND BlowJob day? Who do they think they're kidding! It's not like they fixed the toaster or invented an alternative fuel source or anything.
In all jest though, I take slight offense to this as I'm neither a man nor an eater of red meat. Hello!? It's my Birthday. If you plan to steal my thunder, shouldn't I at least fall into this Holiday's category of celebrators? Besides being mildly annoyed, I also feel dirty. Kind of like I'm a cheap whore or a big slut for being born on Steak & BJ day. Hey man, I'm a non-committed feminist (Okay, so I've never attended any riots, but I still think I'm the coolest thing since sliced bread, and so should you)! Feminists don't support meat, or men, in any dose or combination!
Shit. I was born on a day of sex & violence, blood & lust. Super. Just great.
I knew there had to be something about this written in the stars.
Warning: All content herein contained is not to be taken seriously in any way.
Please, don't get a stick up your ass about something ridiculous I said.
Please & Thanks.
~Splendwhore
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